Ajay's London Dreams shattered? Arshad -- Sanju : Jay Veeru? Aishwarya 'raises' an eye-brow India's International Face : Calendar Launch Will Dino make a comeback? Karan clears his conscience Kangna says NO to sex scenes Mallika wasn't offered 'Murder 2' Salman pays royalty for Munni? Mithunda goes international Shahid faces bad Mausam? SRK works with Salman's bestie!
Sex & the City: Complete Collection (Deluxe Edition)
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OIRAN -- The Highest Order of Japanese Prostitute (1) JAPAN'S QUEEN OF SEX
Image by Okinawa Soba (On the Road for a While)
Well, here she is.
English translators often describe her by using the relatively polite word "Courtesan", which in the case of a Japanese OIRAN or TAYUU, is actually a meaningless euphemism for only one thing : "DAMN EXPENSIVE PROSTITUTE".
I repeat : The Western term "Courtesan" is a highly inaccurate job description for these high-octane Yoshiwara Girls, and so-called translators that call her that should be stripped of their certificates.
The above is one of two old photos I've posted [with the exact same caption] to give a general idea of what an Oiran looks like.....so you can spot them in other old photos (or trespassing on your front lawn), and NOT CONFUSE THEM WITH A GEISHA. A Geisha would go ballistic if you confused her with an OIRAN.
THE HUMAN HEAD AS A PIN CUSHION FOR TENT STAKES AND LIGHTNING RODS
The quickest way to tell if a girl is an OIRAN (or a TAYUU, which is the same damn thing, only she works down in Kyoto) is to check out what her hair-dresser did to her...as in the photo above.
You will immediately notice an accumulation of shoe-horns, knitting needles, dousing rods, back-scratchers, Bagpipes, chopsticks, scrap lumber, railroad spikes, Lincoln Logs, pipe cleaners, kitchen spatulas, and chunks of old roof shingles poking out from her hair in every direction --- like gear shifts on a Mack Truck or a Backhoe.
However, my above photo is relatively tame compared this photo showing one of these prostitutes walking around with an entire not-yet-assembled bedroom set on top of her head.... believed to be from an IKEA store near Tokyo :
Like stars on a General's uniform, this Crown of Scrap Lumber (which doubled as a Hat Rack for her syphilitic customers) was a sign of her high rank.....AND her popularity with men.
Satisfied repeat customers were off the scale and kept her busy doing what she did best : Giving a "cultural" five-minute song-and-dance act, followed by some witty, though completely useless conversation --- before finally shutting up and giving him a blow job (or whatever else he wanted that his wife or mistress refused to do).
Woo Hoo !
SOUVENIRS OF ECSTASY
New customers of any means had to wait their turn to find out what all the buzz was about.
But, try any fancy moves she didn't like, and she just might pull one of those shish-ka-bob spears out of her hair, and run you through ! --- or worse, give you an incurable STD as a souvenir of your time with her.
How exciting. (One Japanese doctor during the Meiji-era estimated that 80% of the men he observed in a public bath house had some visible form of VD. Penicillin eventually came along to help clean up the situation to some controllable degree).
NICOLA TESLA
Rumor has it that virtually every invention born from the genius of electrical engineer, Nicola Tesla were actually based on schematics designed around the placement of the Orian's hair ornaments --- supposedly observed by Tesla on one of his many unrecorded (and still undocumented) trips to Japan during the latter part of the 19th Century.
Upon seeing an Oiran walking on a pair of those 18-inch-high "insulator shoes" suddenly get caught in a thunderstorm, yet remain unhurt after a huge bolt of high-frequency lightning struck her "antenna array" hair-do --- only to proceed to ground over the surface of her wet, silk kimono in a burst of hissing steam --- Tesla cried out, "Holy Mother of God ! ..... The Universe is mine !".
After buying a huge stack of Oiran and Tayuu woodblock prints for further study, he hopped on the next steamer back to America, and the rest is Nobel Prize-winning History.
OTHER POSSIBILITIES....AND A TRAVEL ADVISORY
Speaking of Antenna Arrays, I have no doubt that if this Queen of Sex was alive today, her hair-pins would probably pick up AM, FM, VHF, UHF, Digital HDTV...and possibly a Short Wave Radio chat from some Ham operator in New Zealand.
She would also do well to avoid a visit to Pennsylvania or Minnesota during dear hunting season. All it would take is two or three beers for shot-gun totin' Cleetus or Billy-Bob to confuse her with a 12-point Buck sporting a great rack of antlers.
What ? You don't like my mocking spoof of Japan's culture of over-rated prostitutes and prostitution, and you want some more SERIOUS commentary about these girls who were sold into this profession as children ? OK. See this photo : www.flickr.com/photos/24443965@N08/2701588987/
FOR THE ENTIRE FAMILY
For a modern-day, popular family festival that was once popular with prostitutes here in Japan, please go here and be enlightened --- making sure you scroll down through all the pics showing families and children having a good time : babibubebo.com/2008/04/07/kanamara-matsuri-festival-of-th...
These are masturbation prevention belts in the Sex Machines Museum. You put them on to prevent, well, you know.
The one on the right scares the bejeebers out of me. Holy crap.
Officials: Sex offender law has few problems
Scott Hildenbrand has a pragmatic attitude about the responsibility law-enforcement agencies have to keep track of registered sex offenders who live in area communities.
?The Sopranos?? Jamie-Lynn DiScala is a knockout as the woman at the center of Hollywood?s most provocative scandal ? in this uncensored version that bares it all! Heidi Fleiss turns sex into success with a call girl business that caters to Hollywood?s biggest celebrities, but the ?high life? can?t last forever.The only-in-Hollywood saga of Heidi Fleiss gets a breathless TV-movie workout in Call Me: The Rise and Fall of Heidi Fleiss, a romp through the call-girl follies of America's most famous madam. The Heidi story had enough trashy aspects to sink a garbage scow, and most of them are aired out in this tale of a respectable girl who rose through the ranks to become a successful businesswoman--and the holder of the most explosive little black book in Tinseltown. Experienced TV director Charles MacDougall must have noticed the story's similarities to GoodFellas, because he loads the movie with oodles of Scorsese-like flash and dazzle, complete with hyperactive camera and punchy songs. At least this makes the TV-movies values more fun than usual to look at, and Robert Davi seems to be having a ball as Fleiss's conduit into the sleaze world, director Ivan Nagy. (How Oscar-winner Brenda Fricker got involved in this we'll pass over.) Playing Fleiss is Sopranos co-star Jamie-Lynn DiScala, who certainly conjures up the right note of spoiled vapidity. The unrated DVD has nudity (DiScala's body double, we're talking here), but the movie gets stingy on naming names--as though the identities of actors and filmmakers who turned up in the little black book hadn't leaked out already. --Robert Horton
Fast-forward three years later to this scintillating sequel. Jess has a good guy in her life but a newly-divorced Alex has returned to win back her heart--not knowing about the son they have together. On top of all this Sara now 18 years old has become obsessed with losing her virginity. Jess struggles to teach her kid the difference between love and lust when she herself is torn between the two.
Ajay's London Dreams shattered? Arshad -- Sanju : Jay Veeru? Aishwarya 'raises' an eye-brow India's International Face : Calendar Launch Will Dino make a comeback? Karan clears his conscience Kangna says NO to sex scenes Mallika wasn't offered 'Murder 2' Salman pays royalty for Munni? Mithunda goes international Shahid faces bad Mausam? SRK works with Salman's bestie!
